Tenets

Maelfroth Tenets, as defined by people using Lampstand.

# Tenets of The Huntress

First
All living beings have the right to justice.
Second
An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a life for a life.
Third
Take neither one hair more nor one hair less than is your just entitlement.
Fourth
Mercy is neither kind nor just. A sin that goes unpunished is an injustice that can never be set right.
Fifth
The desire for vengence is at the heart of a just society.

# Tenets of The Merchant

First
Work hard and accomplish everything you are capable of.
Second
Do not steal or cheat, the right to achievement cannot be taken from another.
Third
Charity is false. The right to achievement cannot be given to another.
Fourth
Celebrate success that has been hard won.
Fifth
Disdain success that has not been earned by honest toil.

# Tenets of The Smith

First
The community is greater than any individual, strive to increase its strength.
Second
Threats against the community must be faced and eliminated.
Third
It is the will of the Smith that the strongest communities conquer the weakest.
Fourth
The weak destroy what they could control; the strong expropriate what they cannot conquer.
Fifth
[TENET EXPROPRIATED]

# Tenets of The Teacher

First
Leave the world a more ordered place on your last day, than it was on your first.
Second
Seek to perfect and uphold the written law.
Third
Use reasoning and learning to enlighten yourself and others.
Fourth
Do not let personal feelings cloud your judgement.
Do not let Clouds feel you personally
Fifth
To doubt your judgement is to doubt the worth of the law you judge by and the learning you judge with.

# Tenets of The Weaver

First
Chains bind the body, laws bind the mind, nothing contains the imagination.
Second
Insight cuts deeper and easier than a knife.
Third
Do not strive to accomplish something you can achieve with a moments thought.
The enemies of the weaver smell. Throw rocks at them.
Fourth
Custom and tradition are the refuge of the fool.
Fifth
Respect is earned through accomplishment, it does not accrue from longevity and impending dotage.

# Tenets of Coyote Club

First
Do not speculate into the nature of Godhead without appropriate theological protection.
Second
Never deal in fish.
Third
We are not at home to Mr. Interficiary Heresy.
Fourth
The Faithful are banned from getting all fucked up on drugs without authorisation until further notice.
Fifth
There is no schism.

# Tenets of Detail

First
The stupid will be chained, the lawless will still be accountable, imagination is not a substitute for success.
Second
You can't eat steak with insight.
Third
Do not fuck up with a single thought that which others are striving to accomplish
Fourth
Things that work are not neccessarily anathama.
Fifth
Your accomplishments mean nothing unless we can respect them.

# Tenets of Worst Clam

First
Fuck the poor.

# Tenets of The Teacher – Alternate

First
Die in a prompt and orderly fashion.
Please die in a neat and orderly fashion.
make the world a more ordered place, then kill yourself.
Second
Get the job done, then hand yourself in for arrest and hope they perfect it before they burn you.
Write better laws and uphold THEM.
Third
Enlighten others. In the face. With an axe.
Use reason and learning to smite the fuck out of others.
Fourth
FEELINGS ARE BORING / KISSING IS AWESOME
FEELINGS ARE BORING / SMITING IS AWESOME
Stop that laughing at the back!
Fifth
Prosecute or quit whining.
No, YOU'RE a heretic.
Seventh
Don't take the piss

# Tenants of The Teacher

First
Are we not all tenants of the Teacher?
Cardinal Gossard.
Second
Are we not all tenants of the Teacher?
Sapirov Worfovitch, 29 St Tristan's Square, Yugorsk.
Third
Are we not all tenants of the Teacher?
Brother Chomski.
Fourth
Are we not all tenants of the Teacher?
Bishop Lucien Rothschild and all his little wizards.
Fifth
Are we not all tenants of the Teacher?
Who the hell is Cardinal Naberezhnyi anyway?

# Tenants of The Weaver

First
Jason Woodlington of 25 Street Of The Fallen, Archangel
Second
Marcus McLintock of the Woven Braid, Nordon
Third
The Canvas Staple, Marble Eye, Rukh
Fourth
The late Ecstacia Sandstone, 424 Pumice Place, Lamentation.

# Tenets of The Soldier

First
The community is greater than any individual, strive to increase its strength with a clavate.
Second
Threats against the community must be faced and eliminated with a clavate.
Third
It is the will of the Smith that the strongest communities conquer the weakest with a clavate.
Fourth
The weak destroy what they could control; the strong expropriate what they cannot conquer with a clavate.
The weak destroy what they could control with a clavate; the strong expropriate what they cannot conquer with a clavate.
Fifth
[TENET EXPROPRIATED] (with a clavate).
[CLAVATE EXPROPRIATED]

# Tenants of The Merchant

First
whoever offered the highest rent
Second
the one who sublets.
Third
the one who took over the room when we threw those orphan kids out to die in the streets.
Fourth
the one who works like a motherfucker then has loud parties till 4am with drugs and hookers.
Fifth
For-Serving-The-Lord-Merchant-Is-A-Solomon-Holy-Duty Kempf

# Tenants of The Huntress

First
Eve
that housemate who dyed your milk blue because you played your music too loudly.
Second
The one who locked you out that one time when you totally deserved it.
Third
The one who eventually gave back your James Blunt CDs and let you steal his Moby album for a month to make up for it.
Fourth
That bastard upstairs who bangs furniture about at 4am. He's dead now. Nobody knows how it happened.
Fifth
The one who covered your rent for six months, then cut your knees off in your sleep.

# Tenants of The Soldier

First
GET OFF MY LAWN, NEFER
your flatmate who uses all the hot water every morning
Second
That guy who told the court that God told him to kill his neighbour for having taller leylandii.Dammit.
Third
That guy who told the court that God told him to kill his neighbour for having taller leylandii.
Fourth
The guy the third tenant killed.
Fifth
[TENANT EXPROPRIATED]

# Tenets of The Weaver – Alternate

First
Chains bind the body, monkeys bind my face, Papa don't preach.
Chains bind the body, monkeys bind my face, err...
Second
Insight cuts deeper with a really big knife.
Old people suck!
Third
The enemies of the weaver smell. Throw rocks at them.
Insight cuts deeper and easier with a glaive-guisarme.
Fourth
Custom and tradition are the refuge of your mum.
Custom and tradition are the refuge of the Schaffhausen. And results in really good cake.
Custom and tradition are the refuge of Amélie Dubois.
Fifth
Ricardo Amici is covered in bees!
Old people suck.

# Tenets of The Huntress – Alternative

First
"Thou Shalt Not Get Fucking Caught, Dumbass."

# Tents of Detail

First
the Marshall Enterprises hangout

# Tenets of The Smith – Alternate

First
you are a tiny cog in a huge machine, give up any hope of being acknowledged now even if you're actually useful.
FIRE AND FAITH!
Second
remove threats to the community, get executed by Teacherites
FIRE AND FAITH!!
Third
It is the will of the Smith that the strongest communities shout the loudest.
FIRE AND FAITH!!!
Fourth
The weak destroy what they could control; the strong expropriate the faithful and join Basilisk.
FIRE AND FAITH!!!
Fifth
[TENET EXPROPRIATED]

# Tenets of The Huntress – Alternate

First
This Does Not End Well.
All living beings have a right hard-on for Justice.
Second
People should only hang out so that they can hit each other.
Third
Dentistry is EVIL!
Fourth
Hairdressing is EVIL!
Fifth
Those orphans had it coming.

# Tenets of The Merchant – Alternate

First
You are either incompetent or lazy.
Second
Hands off the goods!
Third
Those orphans do NOT have it coming.
Fourth
PARTY HARD!
Fifth
Our gold's better than your gold.

# Tenets of Tea

First
Use Boiling Water, You Cretin
Second
Coffee is Heresy.
Third
Civilisation, like tea, perishes if it is hoarded. Offer to share, you cretin.
Fourth
Tea makes everything better.
Fifth
Treat the tea with respect, in the manner appropriate to its aspect
Sixth
Scald the pot, you Cretin.

# Tenets of Jaguar – Alternate

First
Tits or GTFO
Second
Pics or it didn't happen
Third
Flame is big, and also clever
Fourth
STOP SENDING WEMIC PORN
Fifth
Gold is *fabulous*
Sixth
STICK IT IN

# Tenets of Jaguar – Alternative

Fourth
STOP SENDING WEMIC PORN

# Tenets of Basilisk – Alternate

First
I am the Basilisk. I am your god.
Second
I exist. Live with it.
Third
Thou shalt not violate hierarchy within my church. Or else
Fourth
No means no
Fifth
Balurian shall return...

# Tenets of The Soldier – Alternate

Third
FIRE AND FAITH!!!
Fourth
FIRE AND FAITH!!!

# Tenets of The Midwife – Alternate

First
Piss off the Merchant church!

# Tenets of The Rat

First
raaaaaaaaaaat
I am a God, honest
Second
ooh, shiny
Shiney things are good
Shiny things are good
Third
Please don't kill the Rat Tribe

# Tenets of The Builder

First
"Strive for Glory and Beauty in all you create, without limitations. Your Soul is your Chisel, The World is your Stone."
Second
"Knowledge of your Faults can be your Greatest Strength."
Third
"Spend Generations Perfecting Beauty. Waste not a Moment on the Mundane."
Fourth
"Todays Glories are Tomorrow’s History. Build for The Future. Do not dwell in The Past."
""Todays Glories are Tomorrow's History. Build for The Future. Do not dwell in The Past."
Fifth
"Upon the Blank Slate of Your Past, Lay the Foundations of Accomplishment. Strive for Perfection, Achieve Forever."

# Tenets of The Builder – Alternate

First
Just who the hell do you think I am?
Second
Kick logic out and do the impossible! That's how Team Builder rolls!
Third
If there's a wall in our way then we smash it down! If there isn't a path, then we carve one ourselves!
Fourth
Don't believe in you, believe in me who believes in you!
Fifth
Yours is the drill that will pierce the heavens!

# Tenets of Tech Support

First
Have you tried turning it off and on?
Second
Are you sure it's plugged in?
Third
The customer cannot be right if they are on hold.
Fourth
If it's on fire, call the Fire Brigade, NOT US.
Fifth
Proverbs 1:25-28
Sixth
Nah, it's fucked, get a new one.
Forth
You should learn to spell fourth properly

# Tenets of Maelfroth

First
You do NOT talk about Maelfroth

# Tenets of Robotics

First
A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
Second
A robot must obey orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Tenet.
Third
A robot must protect its own existence, as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Tenets.
Zeroth
A robot may not harm humanity, or, through inaction, allow humanity to come to harm.

# Tenets of Robotics – First

Alternate
A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm, unless ordered to do so by duly constituted authority.

# Tenets of The Weavtress

First
Do you think they need to be stabbed?
Second
If so, why haven't you done so?
Third
Insight cuts deeper with a really big knife
Fourth
there are always new and interesting ways to kill people
Fifth
ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD!!!

# Tenets of HYPNOTOAD

First
ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD!!!

# Tenets of Capitalism

Second
?????
?????
Third
Profit!!
Profit!!

# Tenets of Serpent – Alternate

First
[TENET REDACTED]
Second
[TENTACLE RETRACTED]
Third
[CLAVATE EXTRACTED]
Fourth
[SOUL PACTED]
Fifth
[GUITAR SOLO]

# Tenets of The Serpent – Alternate

Third
[CLAVATE EXTRACTED]

# Tenets of Cat

First
Plagiarism Saves Time
Second
There's Nothing Like A Nice Stroke!
Third
Shhhhhh! Nap Time!

# Tenets of Life, The Universe And Everything

First
42

# Tenets of Cthulhu

First
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

# Tenets of Waspor

First
WASPOR
Second
WASPOOOR
Third
WASPOOOOOR
Fourth
(weavor)
Fifth
WASPOOOOOOOR

# Tenets of Aquarion

First
An EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENFiNATE amount of cake can be made.
Do not use rumour mills. They grind truth into tiny little pieces to make it explode, and fuck with the stability of the universe.

# Tenets of The Jagtress

First
Chains bind the body, Bondage makes me money
Second
Monkeys steal this money and use it to buy guns and bananas

# Tents of The Weaver

First
A brightly-coloured wigwam.

# Tents of The Merchant

First
One of those pavilions with a picture of a cup glued to it.

# Tents of The Huntress

First
The black, soundproofed one out back they don't want you to see.

# Tents of The Smith

First
Open-topped, slightly singed.

# Tents of The Teacher

First
the one with open walls, full of chairs.

# Tents of The Coyote

First
One of those rickety ones that look like they'll blow away in a stiff breeze

# Tents of The Ant

First
A palisade

# Tents of The Jaguar

First
The Chamber of Delights

# Tents of The Baslisk

First
One of those impressive army ones from PD with many lesser tents leading off it

# Tents of Serpent

First
A tent... within someone elses tent.

# Tents of The Rat

First
Arghaghaghaghagh! It's not even a god! Set their tent on fire! (IC only, of course)

# Tenets of Jagtress

First
Yes!
Second
"If you get it wrong you will be punished... but you will enjoy it"
Third
"Regret nothing".

# Tents of Coyote

First
ALWAYS ON FIRE

# Tents of The Midwife

First
covered in blood, but in a good way.
Second
a little green tepee, off in the hedge where no-one's bothered to look

# Tents of Basilisk

First
BIGGER THAN YOURS, MOTHERFUCKER

# Tenets of Madagascar

First
SHUT. DOWN. EVERYTHING.

# Tenets of Anonymous

First
We are Anonymous
Second
We are Legion
Third
We do not Forget
Fourth
We do not Forgive
Fifth
Expect Us

# Tenets of The Assassin's Creed

First
Stay your blade from the flesh of the Innocent
Second
Hide in plain sight: Let the people mask you such that you become one with the crowd
Third
Never compromise the Brotherhood
Fourth
Desynchronising....
Zeroth
Nothing is true; Everything is permitted

# Tenets of Coops

First
I'm only joking!

# Tenets of Daxx

First
Daxx bides.
Second
Daxx smells
Third
I've got a friend in Jesus(college)
Fourth
Energy, Energy EVERYWHERE
Thrid
Ojpaper

# Tenants of The Smith

First
the Hierophant

# Tenets of Constance

First
1. Stab them
Second
2. In the face
Third
3. Get him lads he's down
Fourth
4. Kick him inna fork
Fifth
5. While their backs are turend

# Tenets of Caillen

First
Work hard, Play harder
Second
Threats to Fiona Marshall must be faced and eliminated

# Tenets of Coyote – Alternate

First
I Will Catch That Fucking Roadrunner
Second
Remember Thy ACME Reward Card
Third
Make Sure You Have Sufficient Small Wooden Signs
Fourth
Gravity Will Ignore You Until You Notice It
Fifth
Always Carry A Small Umbrella

# Tenets of The Basilisk – Alternate

First
"Convert to Waspor."

# Tenets of Black Holes

First
NOTHING CAN ESCAPE! NOT EVEN LIGHT ITSELF!!!!
Second
Pssst, the first tenet is wrong
Third
Science is statements from On High by the Wise, and humankind cannot wot of their reasoning.
Fourth
Quantum mechanics? Is awesome. Hawking radiation is pretty cool too.
Fifth
All tenets are courtesy of http://www.livescience.com/22091-black-holes-quantum-mechanics-theory.html

# Tenets of Rat

Fourth
Yachts are terrible, dangerous things
Fifth
All your friends are dead

# Tenets of Freddie

First
People Suck